Monday, June 11, 2007
Hey (; i hope people still do visit this!
(because this blog needs to be revived, i changed the picture in the bg to make it seem all new and improved! haha. anyway, it's one of the nicest pictures i took in Buru during a sunrise)
Firstly, my apologies for not blogging here in a long while.
Secondly, would just like to thank God for blessing and you guys for praying for the Buru Team. Buru was indeed a wonderful experience, and personally, a good retreat (and pre-ADVANCE)... i think we will work something out with our team soon so we can prepare a good proper presentation (: In the meantime, please do continue to pray for Buru, because throughout the month of June, there will be a total of 7 teams going down (batch by batch) to continue the mission work.
Thirdly, would just like to say WELL DONE to everybody for the wonderful games played yesterday! I had fun! (even though we lost... AGAIN hahaha but it was a very very close and exciting fight aye?) And also a huge thank you to tiffany and grace for coordinating the matches and logistics and also the bbq after that! Even though bbq turnout was small, it was nice to see people helping one another, laughing and fighting to smear charcoal powder on one another over the fire, people chilling out by the pool and just interacting and having fun (:
Lastly, I have something to share... during the bbq ytd, i was talking to two others and our conversation drifted to service and (in fact, while) studying / working. There was a slight disagreement regarding how much we ought to be studying, why we are studying and the likes, while revolving around a life of service. There was no conclusion, but i went back home feeling utterly terrible and confused because what was presented to me contradicted what I have been taught and have grown to embrace. And even though i did continue to discuss with one of them online after that, I was still feeling unsure and basically very very exhausted (physically and mentally) and weary about the future. Went to sleep after a quick prayer for peace and did not read the bible or my daily bread because i was zonking out.
This morning, still feeling confused, i took out my bible and my daily bread and flipped to June 11, Monday's article. Passage was taken from Psalm 91:9-16
If you make the Most High your dwelling-
even the Lord, who is my refude-
then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.
For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
"Because he loves me," says the Lord, "I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life will I satisfy him,
and show him my salvation."
I remembered that yesterday, while walking out of FMSS, i saw a verse (which i cant remember now) beside the school gates, and it was either the exact same verse, or the message it was bringing across was the same. And this particular commentary from the daily bread struck me "The future can be a scary place. The unknown can be overwhelming, especially when the known has so many struggles. That's why we need to trust in what God has promised."
I started to think, have I really depended on my own ability so much that I tend to constantly overlook the fact that my strength and capabilites come from God?
Thinking that a new term in uni in a demanding course will require alot of time, effort, hardwork and focus, I was all ready to throw myself 100%, even 110%, into a new mugger life (which unlike what many people think, I have not been leading in my years of studying so far), sacrificing and forgoing and ceasing all other aspects of life be it service in church, sports and cca, even the occasional meaningless fun with people i love. But after reading this passage, what came to me instead was that my life is in God's hands! My friend (during bbq) was right, whether or not I am going to do well does not depend solely on how much effort I was going to put in, but whether or not God deems it more important than anything else, that I do well (in His greater plan). Moreover, whether or not I am going to do well does not even mean anything as compared to whether or not I was going to further His kingdom during my time on earth. What didn't make sense to me last night slowly begun to make sense as i allowed God's Word to search my heart and my thoughts.
Our BS yesterday was so timely - our lives have become far too self-centred. In everything we do, we want to seek out an end that will eventually benefit ourselves.. even though i had just spent time preparing for, and leading BS, i had once again forgotten how to lead a God-centred life that very same night. If my studying was for God, i don't think He'd want me to find confusion in contemplating this conflict of interests - whether or not i'd have time to serve while studying. The fact is, God wants us to strike a good balance in everthing we do, for HIM, not for ourselves.
So with that, I'd just like to say thank you to my friends for allowing God to speak through you guys, and also shout out an encouragement to anyone who may be facing anything similar to this - God is in control! We just got to direct our paths to Him.
Have a blessed week everybody! and do blog(:
michkoo
@ 3:20 PM
